I have been married a little bit over 3 years, (married in June of 2008) and in that time The Wife and I have sort of fallen into our roles when it comes to the household chores, however, this wasn’t always the case. In the beginning it was fiscal chaos. She was paying some of the bills, I was paying some of the bills; one hand had no idea what the other was doing and it took me way too long to fix. I wrote about making a financial plan 6 months after we were married! Six Months.
One Captain or Two Captain Ship?
My house is a one captain ship. I handle 98% of everything to do with Money:
- I pay all the bills
- I handle all the investments
- I control and watch like a hawk 4 out of 5 checking accounts
- I control 9 out of 10 Credit Cards (although only one has a revolving debt)
- I handle most of the savings accounts
Am I control freak? Not really. Is it because I make all the money? No way, she contributes half of the household expenses on the first and fifteenth of the month. The reason is because I am a Personal Finance Junkie (500+ posts should indicate that). It works for us.
I actually don’t know anyone in my off-line life that splits the work up. It seems to me that notwithstanding clichés, but having two captains would be too many cooks in the kitchen and too many chiefs.
Working in a Two Captain Financial Household
I read blogs where both spouses are into it, but they seem very rare. It works for them. It seems to work because they split the actual responsibility, so one would handle checking and the other investments. Otherwise, it is impossible to know exactly what anyone else is doing.
Who Runs Your Financial Household?
If you are running a single captain ship who is running it? While the past may have seemed like the men took care of all things money I think relying on the gender argument is more or less dead. I don’t even think I have any friends around my age that use it as a justification as to who runs their financial house. I do have to admit that I have said to The Wife in one of her irrational moments
I am a grown ass man that works hard if I want to buy XYZ I will buy it
Yes, I really used the words grown ass man but never end up buying anything! She is usually right that we don’t need it but I am absolutely positive that we can afford it (not trying to reopen up this argument), so I digress.
In my small sampling of asking friends it is almost split who takes care of everything associated with the basics, however, it is absolutely skewed towards the man handling the investments. When asked why they let the other spouse take care of everything the most common answers are
I just want to be able to purchase what I want let them worry about the day to day things
They are better at it.
I don’t want to.
Who runs your Financial Household? and Why?