I always thought I didn’t need a budget, nor did I ever want to worry about limiting myself. I think I figured I could always add / subtract and keep things all in my head. Like most people who rock out this “method” I got things done but was not working anywhere near 100%.
While this worked for me (albeit not at an optimal level), I learned that The Wife was not liking it! You know what? She didn’t have to like it…nor should she be forced to be at my mind’s whim. It is hard for me to type but here it goes:
- I WAS WRONG;
- I WAS COMPLETELY UTTERLY WRONG;
- 1000% WRONG
So, after a lively discussion we talked about how we should set up our finances. We both read personal finance blogs so we both kind of had an idea of what would work for us. Luckily it was the same basic design. So here it is!
What did we accomplish doing this exercise?
- We now know what is up! Huge for marital bliss
- We came up with a plan we both like – again marital bliss
- We figured out our bottom line dollar amount needed for monthly expenses.
- Added teeth to our debt snowball
- Have an efficient way to pay the bills
- Start to use our joint account more
Any old married couples have a better set up we should try?










This is definitely something I need to investigate further and really attack like you two did. I am in the process right now of moving towards engagement and this is the biggest issue that we have. Specifically, how we are going to manage the debts I have incurred. Glad to see you are achieving more bliss than discord! Love the diagram as well!
Take it as you may, but being about the same age as you (I think I have 2 years on you, young grasshopper) the combining of the finances wasn’t the hardest thing The Wife and I had to do, but it has been a constant pain in the ass.
I think it has a lot to do with both of our need to control that aspect. I have friends who are having an easier time because each role was defined either by statement or just by happenstance. In The Wife and I’s situation we are actually both playing the same roles which leads to both overlap and carelessness (I am willing to take the blame on most of the carelessness part).
As far as our debt is concerned, I have about 60 or 70K of law school debt (all at 3.5% to 5% FIXED) she knew that it was my dream to go to law school and if we were to get married I was going to have the typical law student debt (fortunatly it is not as high as some people’s because I lived at home and didn’t need to take 17% private loans to pay the rent.
Sorry for the long reply
Also, I am ALL about the diagrams. There is literally not one day at work when I don’t have to explain a trust or will where I don’t have to get up to the dry earse board and draw out what I am talking about.
[...] about we take me for example? It was not until The Wife and I decided to combine personal finances and she became aware of my blog that I got serious! For readers of this blog – this is not new [...]
[...] long is it going to take you to change your entire money flow? An hour or [...]
Creating my financial map was a HUGE help to me too. I especially love how it gives me an quick visual overview of our entire financial situation! Check it out & let me know what you think.
[...] MyJourneyToMillions – Creating a map helped this couple see just how deficient their previous plan was! [...]
[...] is me. I needed a wake up call, in the worst kind of way. The first thing I did was, make a plan with the Wife. She is the Van Damm of debt. She hates, it is willing to tell you and is willing [...]
[...] starting this blog and getting my finances in order, my feelings about the subject changed and The Wife and I created a Plan. Despite the change in feelings, I never picked up on a piece of software. Since my only [...]
[...] Make a Plan and Become Accountable to Someone, Anyone(Hell if you want it to be me, Contact me) [...]
[...] turned from how do I blame someone else to how do we fix it. I then talked with about how The Wife and I made a Plan and I told him I would forward him the spreadsheet I used for the first 12 months of this blog (i.e. [...]
[...] from the beginning that if The Wife and I were going to work together financially we would need a cash flow diagram and a plan, and beyond a few tweaks in the numbers the plan has been on autopilot for [...]
[...] I should mention when describing theories or estate planning ideas, I like to draw pictures and flow charts. The Wife hates [...]
[...] there is nothing earth shattering in this post, but these numbers should inspire you to create a debt repayment plan and get moving!NYC Personal Finance Blogger Meet-UpOn a side Note, I had the opportunity to meet [...]
[...] original plan did not come naturally; I was even proud that we came together and made a debt repayment and financial plan. I do believe my flow charting skills have improved over the [...]